Smithy.

Your forge has been silent for a while now. Or maybe it's just that your creations are not being revealed. Despite being unable to enjoy what you whip into existence from the thin, cold air, there is hope that your little gems are still tumbling from the fire to clink with satisfactory glee on the flagstones of your hearth.

House.

It's just a backdrop.

Winter's visited.

The blinds are closed. The heating is on. My belongings are lit by the yellow glow of a single lamp. My room is an enclosed, padded box, so I can cough and sleep this fever away in privacy. I haven't even looked outside today. Apparently it's snowing. The Snow Maidens are spreading their gifts once again. But the outside does not concern me right now. The last thing I want to consider is the cold.
But when I glance up from my screen, I get a sudden glimpse, a flash of white: the winter has slid its long fingers into my room.
A crooked mirror. An inexplicable gap between blind and window. And there, sat frozen on my shelf, is an image of cold. Thin branches scratch black lines across the blue-white of the icy sky. Edged with frost, they glitter and flicker with the movement of the light. This slither of winter is bordered by the blue of my blinds and it looks like... a fairytale.

My answer.

I’m hiding behind all these words
I cannot afford to say.
Answers gone ungiven.
Questions left unasked.
They’re holding me captive.
I’m not the answer
for all the questions you have.
An argument with no end,
that stretches in my minds eye
into all eternity.
This isn’t how I want to remember you.
The interrogation is building up.
Brick by boring brick;
a wall of question marks.
They keep me occupied,
they keep me alone.
The answer you wanted,
but I’m long gone.
I’m lost behind all these words
I cannot afford to say.

Cardboard boxes.

So. Did I say we've found a new house? It's big and spacious. It's warm and clean. It has rooms enough and more, and a large kitchen and two cookers, and a decent sized garden, and an attic floor specially for myself and my sister with blue carpets and skylights and a lilac spiral staircase leading to it and loft cubbyholes for our secrets and a view over the roofs. It has already installed surround sound in the den, and an oversized watertight garage. It has a study and a living room especially for the parents. It has no character. It's gorgeous, but it is not home.

Home right now is... a mess. Cardboard boxes stand stacked on top of each other in the corners of rooms (esp mine). Clothes and junk are strewn all over the place, or else placed in piles of importance. There's a list of "Things to do" on the kitchen side, but is it all crossed off? No. One solitary line obscures a single item, and that is all.

So. Did I say we're moving in in two weeks? To look around this house, you wouldn't believe it. But that doesn't really bother me. The longer things stay as they are here, the longer I can pretend that all of this... isn't really happening.

Release.

And when at last it came, it was a flood. The waves shuddered and juddered and rocked the walls, so that the cracks drove deeper and deeper into the brickwork. The cement was dissolved in the tainted waters, and with sighs and groans the walls crumbled into rubble. One corner at a time. Murky black with the remnants of adorning paint, the ripples left stained streaks, tide marks, on each piece as it swayed through the water to sink, shattered and tired, into the sand of the bed.

Music!

And so much of it! For so many years I’ve been content with my music. An occasional artist would wander into my scope of hearing and I’d leap them, adopt them, and keep them, and continue on my contented little way. This month, however, mostly due to KeyChild, the list has been growing and growing and growing and…
Lemme share a few of them with you.
A Fine Frenzy. My friend has a cd and has mailed it to me and now I am forever in her debt. A sound to die for.
Thievery Corporation. Sounds like summer. Some of their songs are amazing. And more delicious female vocals.
Fink. A voice both familiar (So familiar in fact, that I can’t help wondering if I’ve heard any of his music before… ) and comforting, that I’ve completely fallen in love with. Gorgeous.
Cat Power. I’ve just ordered her cd The Greatest, and I wish it would hurry up and come! Soft vocals with a jazzy sound - yum.
Blue Foundation. I’m playing their song Bonfires on repeat at the moment.
The Pierces. Discovered thanks to an advert on tv. Their clean sound is addictive.
And also Anna Nalick has popped up again, along with Allie Moss, and Lisa Mitchell is also making a reappearance as I realize I only have four of her songs… Which MUST be rectified.
I can see that my money is not necessarily going to go on Christmas presents this year...